How to Stop Worrying About What Other People Think

By Kathleen Bren

If you want to live an authentic, empowered existence on this planet, you must get over the paralysis that comes with worrying about other people’s opinions. Worrying about what other people think is an effort in futility.

First, it is not possible to know the thoughts of others in the literal sense because you are not them. This means that what you think they might be thinking about you is highly speculative at best. Moreover, it will be heavily influenced by what you think about yourself at that moment. This is commonly known as projection.

Second, even if you did know what other people were thinking about, what do their thoughts have to do with you? Other people have the right to think about whatever they choose to think about, and so do you. What they think about you is really none of your business.

Last, the thoughts you hold within your mind are the only thoughts you really have any control over. Instead of fretting over something you cannot control, namely other people’s thoughts, why not spend your time and energy cleaning up your own thought process.

Worrying about what other people think is really a sign that you are harboring doubt and insecurity over some aspect of your life. Here is an example. If you have an abundance of wealth in your life, and you worry about what other people think about the kind of house you live in or the kind of car you drive, this is an opportunity to do some inner work and uncover the source of the concern.

The source of the concern is not coming from outside of your (i.e. what other people think about you) rather, it is actually coming from within you in the form of some unconscious judgment or guilt that you are holding onto over the subject of money and wealth.

This is a fabulous opportunity to uncover any hidden beliefs you might have surrounding this topic. As you ponder the topic of money and wealth, write down any negative thoughts and feelings you are holding onto, and find a way to re-contextualize them is a way that support you. The same can be done for any topic.

When you make peace with yourself, and learn to love yourself wholly and completely for who you are, the good, the bad and the ugly, you won’t care about what other people think about you because unconditional love does not require external approval.

The next time you find yourself worrying about what someone might be thinking about you look within for the source of the concern and make peace with yourself. It won’t take long before you realize that the approval you seek is your own, and it really doesn’t matter what other people think.

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